Energy to Serve Others

Hey Friends!

At the risk of this episode feeling like a memoir, I'm sharing a personal story about being of service to help you determine how you are of service to others. There's an important differentiation here in knowing where your source of energy comes from when you serve others. 

So join me, and let's dive in.

Being of service is who I am - especially as a Virgo. And based on the patterns and dynamics of my birth family, I grew up being of service to please others and avoid getting judged or hurt. My dedication to delivering - usually over-deliver - on anything asked of me seemed to work well for me in my 20s with a budding career in the financial industry. This industry is infamous for being a traditionally male-dominated, fraternity-style working environment where the women's role was to be supportive. So you can see how my natural tendency to serve others opened up opportunities for me in the financial industry.

I knew how to do this well; it's how I grew up and ingrained in my being. I would go out of my way to please others to be seen as "successful" in my role. I did what was asked or expected of me - even if that was giving up myself and my energy. This was the only way I knew how to operate during this phase of my life.

Yet it was so detrimental to me that I lost myself. People would ask me what I do, and I honestly didn't know how to respond. My mind wanted to say I work to please others. And at a cellular level, I knew I did this to avoid getting hurt. But of my heart of hearts, I was lost. I didn't know who I was or really what I did.

In my late twenties, a series of events in my career created a shift in my patterns. First, there was an incident at work where I made a decision that I felt was undercut by my manager (yes, male), and I was done. In a flurry of emotional anger, I told him, "I quit." We agreed I'd take some time off work and process what I really wanted in my job. Then came the "What Color is Your Parachute" exercise. Remember that? It was the first time I had to answer to myself. I couldn't skirt around this. I had to get clear on what I REALLY enjoyed and wanted in my career. It was the hardest thing for me at this point in my life. Yet, the outcome was clear. I shared my desired role with my manager. He was understanding and supportive. Thankfully my desired role aligned with the growth of the business, and he graciously created a position for me. Before I could step into that role, he needed to hire my replacement. We agreed on the approximate time it would take for that to happen. That time came and went. Weeks turned to months. I began to feel taken advantage of - again. So I mustered the courage and gave him an ultimatum. While he was annoyed and displeased with my tactic, it worked out. I moved into the position that allowed me to blossom in my career - still relying on my tendencies to over-serve and please - but this time in a more empowering way. 

In Shamanic terms, these series of events were Power Retrievals and Soul Retrievals. I retrieved some power I had lost long ago as a child. And through these retrievals, my patterning shifted. 

Again, at the risk of this episode feeling like a memoir, I'll continue and add there were a string of other events in my career and life which served as additional Power Retrievals and Soul Retrievals. Then with the arrival of our daughters, there was a spark. It was then that I felt whole enough to begin a 12+ year journey of really doing the work. I went deep. I unearthed imbalances in my life. I validated and grounded them. I discovered profound, fundamental understandings of my being. And I'm still on this journey!

Then about seven years ago, I was shown - clear as day - ways to be of greater service to humanity. My hyperactive mind (ahem...hello, ego!) told me this vision was unachievable and unrealistic. It made me want to play small and continue hiding behind my corporate job. Yet my heart sang to the recollection of what it means for me to be of service.

And now, today, I feel I'm at home. I generate energy for others to find meaning in life. I guide you on a journey to awaken and align with your truth. I do this by holding and embodying compassion, which allows me to be of service without absorbing others' energy or exhausting my own. This is the work I'm meant to do. It's an undeniable reckoning for me.

So to emphasize the one thing I'm trying to message here - there are different sources of energy when it comes to serving others. So while my life path is to serve others, it started from a fear of being judged or getting hurt. And when that's the source, it's depleting and exhaustive. And when patterns started to shift for me, I began doing deep work to heal the imbalances within my psyche - then, THEN, I saw what being of service means when I'm whole, awake, and serving others while not giving up myself. And when that happens, I'm in service in the purest and most fulfilling way. No masks. No personas. Just loving kindness. Compassion. Peace. And ease.

Full Circle

So to come full circle, I share this story because there's a threaded message that I offer you through a question. Where is the energy source you rely on when you're serving others? Are you operating from a place where you give up your energy to help others? Or a place of compassion where you can be of service while holding and protecting your energy? 

And if you're the former and seek meaning in life and want to awaken and align with your truth - I'm here for you! 

• You can continue to rely on this podcast for practical and relatable ways to nourish your soul. Click subscribe, so you don't miss the approach that provides you the relief you seek.
• You can participate in one of my Sacred Circles that bring women together to nurture themselves through a personal awakening. Check out sparkpathhealing.com/circles.
• And you can always arrange 1:1 sessions through my client practice to dive deep into your work to access and heal imbalances within your psyche. Schedule a free consult, and let's have a conversation. Visit sparkpathhealing.com.

Main Takeaways

The main takeaway from today's show is to notice where your energy source comes from when you feel depleted and exhausted from helping others. Are you giving up too much of yourself and perhaps need boundaries? Or are you embodying compassion without absorbing others' energy or draining your own?

That's it for now.

See you in next week's episode. 

I honor the divine in you.